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How do you know if you're an arsehole, and does it matter in the grand scheme of things?

You can be an interpersonal nightmare and still be someone of decent character.

As for the grand scheme of things — well, that rapidly gets theistic.

"Interpersonal nightmare." I like that. I certainly like it better than "arsehole."

It only sounds nicer, bear in mind.

Why do people call you that?

I'm not good with people.

I think the answer lies in how much of a fuck you give about it.

Not much at all, really.

There you go. You're only a prick if you pretend to care about it.

I don't actually care so I think I'm all right. Brilliant. Thank you.

Nothing matters in the grand scheme of things. We are all insignificant flecks of bone dust being scattered through the mostly empty universe.

Haha just fucking with you. You really can't know. Nobody can every know themselves. Every man is a stranger to himself.

... hahaha okay, okay, no, for serious this time. Just try to be as kind as you can, and don't let yourself off the hook with "but I'm really mad today" or whatever.

Oh, no, I'm the same whether I'm mad or not, it's not that.

Yeah, no, that's just one of a million excuses you can come up with to treat people shittily, like: "I'm mad today" or "they deserve it" or "I'm always this way, it's just how I am."

Don't get me wrong, if you can't hack it and you don't care, there's no problem, per se. At least, no problem you can deal with.

I'm completely willing to accept I'm an arsehole. I just wanted to make certain of it. Second opinions and all.

...More like fifth or sixth opinions.

Only if you're overly concerned with your reputation. Or worried a motley band of misfits is about to descend upon you to teach you the value of friendship.

...Are there actually roving bands of feel-good misfits who would do such a thing, that's horrid.

Unfortunately. Constant vigilance. You never know when someone is about to Teach You A Very Special Lesson.

I think I could do with the Very Special Lessons that involve getting punched. All this "let's be friends" nonsense, though. Ghastly.

Always assume you're the asshole, then behave accordingly.

The real question is, are you good at being an asshole, because if you're bad at being an asshole you should probably fuck off to reevaluate your life choices and then try again after serious-ass introspection.

I'm busy determining the depth of my skill, with regards to arseholery.

It's an important question. You might find out your heart's not really in it, and decide to be A Good Person, or you could turn out to be a total shit.

I, for example, am a total shit. It fits, like a favorite old sweatshirt, or something. You may find yourself otherwise. Whatever, it's fine. But you've learned something about yourself. See, it's about the journey.

[hi freddie, penelope is so goddamn facetious it's like it oozes from her eyeballs.]

Can you have a good heart, and still be a total shit? I think that might be my niche. Others are convinced otherwise.

Hm. Jury's still out on that one. But if it makes you feel better, being a total shit makes it a lot easier to not give a fuck what anybody else thinks about you!

That I mostly have down. Not caring what others think. It's useful. Lets you get more things done, really.

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