(no subject)

[perfect_shoes]

What a wonderful idea. A perfect place to contemplate and discuss the deep mystery and intricacy of the universe at large with piercing questions like-

How can people enjoy marmite?

Comments

[threnodic]

The fuck is marmite.

[perfect_shoes]

Some sort of substance that humans put into their mouths and claim that it does not taste like absolute bitterness.

I've gone through seven different arrangements of tastebuds and none of them ever made marmite taste remotely decent.

[threnodic]

That's a lot of tastebuds, man.

[perfect_shoes]

Thank you. [ a compliment is a compliment even when it isn't. ] Gives things a bit of variety.

[ordinarilyso]

I'm pretty sure that was just invented to frighten people.

[perfect_shoes]

Could do that just as well with a story, surely. A story of a condiment that humans made from beer byproduct to slather on and ruin a perfectly good toast. [ VISIBLE SHUDDER ]

[ordinarilyso]

Beer byproduct? That explains everything.

[perfect_shoes]

Waste not, want not, I suppose, though this is one creation I would waste definitely.

[scarletspeedster]

Sometimes you just really crave something salty I guess? I dunno, I'm more of a sweet tooth myself. Wouldn't say no if I was hungry though.

[perfect_shoes]

A stronger tolerance than me, sir.

[scarletspeedster]

Unforgiving metabolism, more like. I don't always get to be picky with what I eat.

[perfect_shoes]

Interesting. Any particular reason?

[scarletspeedster]

You mean for the metabolism, right? It's kinda hyper-accelerated. Since I got my speed, I need to eat a lot more than before. Doesn't always give me space to decide to avoid certain foods.

[perfect_shoes]

How fascinating! How did you "get your speed," as it were? What a peculiar evolution! No other side effects?

[scarletspeedster]

Not exactly, not unless human evolution is occasionally brought on by direct lightning strike. And possibly chemical baths at the same time. Everything was busy exploding and I wasn't exactly paying attention to the exact order it all happened in.

[Wally shrugs at the question.]

Pretty much everything has to do with my speed, near as I can tell. Let's see... my metabolism's faster, I heal faster too, I move really insanely fast when I want to, I can think faster...

Everything feels like a drag a lot of the time now. Like waiting in a queue behind people who take forever. I get called impatient a lot.

[gulistan]

Ever heard of Stockholm Syndrome?

[perfect_shoes]

...

That does make an unfortunate amount of sense. I've yet to be held captive by marmite, but I now see that day on the horizon.