(no subject)

[meanwhileback]

[Smoking at the podium is probably bad form, but here's Penelope, doing exactly that thing.]

How do you dress when you're at home? Is it different from how you dress when you're at work, or when you're out running errands, or when you're out partying or whatever?

Do you feel like what you wear is part of your personality, or do you use it to mask your personality from the uncaring eye of society or whatever?

Or do you feel like clothes are unimportant and don't have any impact on who you are at all? Because you're frankly fucking wrong, if that's what you think, but I mean I'm not your mom who clearly raised you wrong, so who am I to judge, right?

[Penelope feels she is precisely the one to judge. Everything. Clearly.]

Comments

[kashaph]

Ehhh... whatever fits.

( they're 6' 4", and about 90% of that is leg; nothing is ever long enough or narrow enough, and they can't afford anything new, so everything secondhand gets chopped up and frankensteined back together. )

[meanwhileback]

Wow. Do you model? That's an unnecessary question; are you going to model for me?

[I MUST WRAP YOU IN FUR i mean what]

[kashaph]

— What? Oh, um — no, uh, no thank you, uh.

[meanwhileback]

Why not, though.

[kashaph]

Um...

I can't.

[meanwhileback]

Why not, though.

[kashaph]

( is she seriously asking why they can't perform a job that entails being looked at by a lot of people )

I, ehm... uh...

( face slowly reddening... )

[meanwhileback]

Shy? Seriously? You look like that and you're shy?

[How ANNOYING. Hmm. She cocks a hip and strokes her chin, studiously evaluating the situation.]

I can fix shy. What's your inseam?

[kashaph]

... Long.

( they're not sure. they might have grown. )

[meanwhileback]

Okay, here's a question: Do any of the clothes you currently own actually fit you correctly? I assume you're buying off-the-rack.

[kashaph]

I, ehm... not really...

( even the big and tall store doesn't have anything — they're only one of those adjectives — and it's all overpriced anyway. )

I don't know, I go to charity shops...

[meanwhileback]

Oh, pumpkinblossom. No.

[Penelope is SO MUCH SHORTER than them, but please look at how she just blazes with truth and righteousness when she talks about clothes. It is striking.]

Work for me, I will make ALL your clothes. And they will fit. Fit properly. And they will be so nice. You will be a walking advertisement for me and my astronomical skill and you will get paid AND you will get a wardrobe that befits someone of your status as a magical fashion unicorn. Do the thing.

[kashaph]

I, uh... um... I, uh... don't... know if I can.

( what even is happening here )